Gabriel Harb:  I have to say this is an Honor Mr. President.  I don’t even know how to address you.  Mr. President, Sir, General?

George Washington:  Gabriel my dear lad, you can call me George.

GH:  I couldn’t possibly….

GW:  George!

GH:  Let’s compromise on Sir.

GW:  All right, but you have to lighten up.

GH:  Sir.  Although I would like to ask questions about your childhood, I think it is important to start with your first engagement with enemy forces at Ft. Necessity.  Would it be accurate to say this was your first battle, and can you describe it?

GW:  It was not my first battle, but I definitely consider it my baptism in the fire of combat.  I had made a lot of mistakes that ultimately cost lives, and the mission.  At the same time I don’t regret any of my decisions, because at that time I used my best judgment.  A leader must always stand by his decisions, for better or worse, and one can only hope to learn from the results.  The biggest mistakes were made from the start, I chose a bad location for the construction of Ft. Necessity, and I didn’t have good security on the perimeter.  I allowed the enemy to gain the high ground; our only relief came with the rain that seemed to slow down the rate of fire.  But the rain was also a curse, our trenches were flooded with bloody water, causing great distress on the few men who were still able to fight, it flooded our storage facility soaking the powder for our muskets rendering them useless, and making the ground slippery.  I slipped countless times on the muddy surface, and on the dead and wounded as I barked orders.  All in all, it was a great learning experience.  I learned more about military tactics, I learned from my mistakes, and I learned about myself.  Not for one second was I scared, or lost the ability to make decisions under pressure, not for one second did I consider anything but victory no matter how bad the situation was.

GH:  And you were twenty-one.

GW:  I was twenty-one.

GH:  Sir.  I have to ask.  Why did the French let you and your men live?

GW:  That is a good question.  It is recorded in the history books as a negotiation to deescalate the tension between England and France, with words like “diplomacy, and politics” thrown in; but the truth is that it basically came down to the old  “it is better to fight the devil you know, than the devil you don’t know”.  I would have been the first to hang as commanding officer, if it had not been for a French Lieutenant who brought to the attention of his commander, that if they killed this clown (meaning me).  The British would send a competent commander to replace me, bringing more trouble on themselves.  It was easier to let me live, to contend with me another day.

GH:  But you showed them, right sir?

GW:  No.  I lost the next battle as well (laughs).

GH:  Ha ha.  More rum?

GW:  No thank you.  I will have a cup of coffee later though.

GH:  Please tell us what happened sir.

GW:  The British sent an experienced high-ranking officer to lead the next mission.  Major General Edward Braddock was his name.  I have to say.  I rather liked the old chap.  He just didn’t know what he was up against and walked into an ambush.  The French and their Indian partners had us completely surrounded before they fired the first shot, and they fought guerilla type warfare unlike anything Gen. Braddock had ever seen.  There was panic and confusion.  I begged him to allow me to take the few men who stayed to receive orders into the forest to fight the Indians in their own way.  He refused and we had to retreat.  These experiences would help me tremendously during the difficult years of the revolution.  I don’t know how I survived that attack, I had dysentery, my horse was shot from under me, and a second.  My coat was full of bullet holes, and my hat as well.  We had to marched forty miles to friendly territory to regroup, and gather more troops.  Gen. Braddock died, and I can’t describe the horrors of that night.  The thought of the dead and dying pierced my heart.

GH:  I know that you were considered a hero in Virginia, were you perceived the same way in England?

GW:  No I wasn’t.  In Virginia I was seen as the hero of Braddock’s defeat.  People knew that I had the right idea, when I urged him to adopt a different method of warfare.  People knew I was right, and by strong leadership I was able to gain the respect of my people.  The British however had a different opinion.  The humiliating defeat was the result of the monumental incompetence of the colonials, men like me who had corrupted the integrity of the regular soldiers by urging them to degrade themselves to fight like the Indians. That if it had not been for us, and we had let the regulars fight like the professionals they were, the Indians would have been annihilated in less than an hour. 

GH:  Sir, it sounds to me like the British didn’t know what they were talking about.  Did this make you angry at all?

GW:  I was beyond indignation.  At the same time, their ignorance and pride were a blessing in disguise that would later help me defeat them.

GH:  About the Revolution sir, can you tell us how it all got started?

GW:  The British won the war with the French.  They controlled East North America, but it was not cheap.  They were eighty-two million dollars in debt.  So they decided to give us the privilege of paying that debt.  They thought we would be delighted to be taxed to the point of stupidity to pay for the King’s debt, so they passed the Sugar Act in 1764, which meant we were being taxed on sugar.  Oh yes, we had an endless supply of their damn tea to go with our expensive sugar by the way.  We were outraged, one third of us wanted to rebel against the British right then and there, one third was against the idea, and the other third just didn’t care.  That was when we realized we were being taxed, and there was no one to represent us in England.  The British parliament said we had “virtual representation” thinking we would sit back and let them do this to us.  It didn’t stop there, they taxed our glass, and what broke the camel’s back was the Stamp Act.  We used paper for everything, so this would affect us all, and it was too much now we were all very angry and they knew it.  They knew they were pushing too hard, adding insult to injury they passed the “Declaration Act” which said we were subordinates to King George III, and parliament.  By 1770 we had the “Custom House” incident, and by 1773 we had “The Boston Tea Party” and that was the beginning.

GH:  What a story, and we haven’t even begun yet.  Now get to the meat and potatoes where you can explain how the British pride helped you during the tough road ahead.  Can you tell us about the first battle of the war?

GW:  The battles of Lexington and Concord were the first engagements of the war.  LTC Francis Smith was given the order to capture and destroy the military supplies stored by the Massachusetts militia at Concord.  We knew of their plans weeks before so we were able to move most of our supplies to other locations.  The first shots were fired as the sun was coming out at Lexington.  Maybe you’ve heard of Paul Revere and his midnight ride telling us that the British were coming, he was a good patriot.  When the British caught him they took his horse for the service of the King and forced him to walk home.  There was another though, not many have heard of Israel Bissell, he actually traveled for six days and rode 345 miles shouting, “to arms the war has begun”.  Back to the battles, the militia was outnumbered at Lexington and fell back.  At Concord, our militia defeated the British, and forced them to retreat.  More militiamen arrived as the British tried to escape to Boston, inflicting heavy damage.  The British marched to Boston where combined with reinforcements from LTG Hugh Percy they started the Siege of Boston.

GH:  Sir, I am very interested in the Battle of Bunker Hill.  I heard it was not fought at Bunker Hill, but Breeds Hill, is this true?  If so, what happened?

GW:  On the night of June 16 1775 our troops were ordered to secure Bunker Hill, but it was dark, they got lost and went to Breeds Hill instead.  The British under GEN Gage had no choice but to attack.  It was a difficult battle, we were forced to retreat, but we inflicted heavy losses, which sent shiver up their spines because they knew we were serious, and above all that we were determined.  They thought it would be an easy victory, now they were very worried.  They had underestimated our resolve.

GH:  Sir, after that you were personally involve in a few battle, and lost every single one before the Christmas of 1776.  Can you tell us what was going through your, and the British leadership minds?   

GW:  That is true, up to that point I had lost every battle I was ever involved in.  I never doubted myself, but I knew morale was low.  Especially after King George hired the Hessians, a ruthless German regiment of mercenaries who raped and murdered innocent civilians.  That made me very angry, they were in for the fight of their lives.  King George was livid at his commanding general, because the war wasn’t over yet and winter was approaching.  He wanted us defeated before Christmas, but his generals assured the King, that I was a clown, that I presented no significant difficulties, and that they would kill me and my men in the spring, and they retreated for winter quarters.  I knew this was my chance, I would use their pride against them, they never expected an attack in such horrible weather, from and incompetent “clown”.  I remembered the tactics Gen Wolfe used to defeat the French against them.  On Dec 6 we crossed the Delaware in a sneak attack, the Hessians never saw it coming, they were all too cold, and drunk to put up a fight.  We annihilated them at Trenton, and it was a great morale boost for my men.  Gen. Howe sent his troops to Trenton to kill us, but I was prepared.  We sidestepped the British at Trenton, and fought them at Princeton instead; crushing them, and forcing them to retreat.

GH:  Sir, this is really a great story, I’m glad you are here to tell us about it.  Let me jump to the Battle of Saratoga.  Can you tell us the significance of that battle? 

Oh, how is the pipe?

GW:  I like it.  Is this chocolate flavored?

GH:  Yes sir.

GW:  What flavor is yours?

GH:  Cherry sir.

GW:  That is a bit girly isn’t it?

GH:  Yes sir, but I can get away with it because I’m tough.

GW:  I chopped down a cherry tree once you know?

GH:  I was under the impression nobody knew for sure if the story was true or not.

GW:  Oh, it’s true. 

Saratoga was the turning point of the war.  The British pressed for Albany, but we blocked their way at Bemis Heights.  They made two attempts to break through our defense, but failed miserably, and withdrew to Saratoga where we had them surrounded.  The British had no choice but to surrender, which they did on October 13 1777, one quarter of the British force had surrendered, and although there were many battles to be fought, our independence was within arms reach.

GH:  Sir, can you tell us about the Siege of Charleston?

GW:  The British knew they were in deep trouble, so they changed strategies, and focused on the Southern Colonies, banking on strong loyalist support in the south.  Their first move was to capture Savannah Georgia, but the combined efforts of the Continental Army and the French, forced the British to change plans, and they planned an attack on Charleston South Carolina, which they planned to use as a base for further operations in the North.  After six weeks of siege, Gen Lincoln was forced to surrender about five thousand troops to the British.  It was the biggest loss of troops suffered by the Continental Army in the War.

GH:  That battle was a decisive victory for us.  Our forces under Gen Daniel Morgan won the battle, and it was a turning point in the recon quest of South Carolina.  Gen Morgan was a genius, and his strategy worked perfectly.  The British moved in successive lines, thinking they had it in the bag, only to face a stronger line of defense.  They got tired, frustrated, and suffered many casualties.  Our lines were able to absorb the shock of the British advance.  Morgan’s troops overwhelmed the British under Col Tarleton, in a classic military maneuver, and captured all the enemy forces.

GH:  Sir, I’m sorry to say, our meeting is almost at an end.  I just have a few more questions.  Another great battle was the battle of Guilford court House, can you tell us what happened?

GW:  In 1781 Gen Nathaniel Greene fought the British under the command under Gen Cornwallis at Guilford Court House.  The British won a tactical victory, but suffered many losses.  After the battle Greene moved to South Carolina, while Gen Cornwallis invaded Virginia.  Eventually Cornwallis was ordered by the King to move to Yorktown.  Against every fiber in his body, Gen Cornwallis complied.

GH:  Sir, why did Gen Cornwallis feel going to Yorktown would be a bad idea, and what happened there?

GW:  Gen Cornwallis knew there was no exit strategy if they were to be overwhelmed.  He told this to the King, but King George told him not to worry.  One, it was impossible for the British to be overwhelmed at Yorktown, and even if it did happen, he would send the Royal Navy to rescue them.  What they didn’t count on was that the French Navy would join the fight.  Gen Rochambeau and I fought on land, and Rear Admiral Francois Joseph, along with Comte De Grasse two of my personal heroes, managed to defeat against all odds the British fleet under Sir Thomas Graves, in the Battle of the Chesapeake.  Gen Cornwallis was trapped, and had no choice but to surrender, putting an end to war.  

GH:  Sir, that put an end to the war, Americans won their independence, and you were elected the first president of the United States.  But winning the war was the easy part, keeping it would be tricky, am I right?

GW:  You are.  To save the Republic, we needed a strong economy.  I was not the right man for the job, and I knew it.  Actually, that was what saved us in the long run, I chose someone who could build a strong Treasury.  I chose Alexander Hamilton, one of the most competent men I have ever met, and he was the first secretary of Treasury, a founding father, and former artillery officer during the Revolution.  Hamilton was one of the countries first constitutional lawyers.  He was the author of the economic policies for my administration.  He established a national bank, a system of tariffs (a list of duties imposed by the Government on imports and exports), and established friendly trade relations with Britain.  He built a strong economy, and what made our currency strong was credibility, our money was worth a lot, because the world knew Americans are reliable, and confident.  We had several unique items that were in high demand, that were continually purchased, keeping our money in circulation. 

GH:  Finally sir, what do you think about the 21st Century?

GW:  I think you misunderstood our message, freedom doesn’t mean you can do whatever the hell you want.  You can do what you want, as long as you don’t violate  other people’s  rights.  There has to be common sense, and high standard of decency.  The right to govern yourself is not to be taken lightly; you people don’t even know what that means.  To govern yourselves, you have to have the discipline to say no to yourselves and behave in a respectable, and honorable manner.  It takes discipline and effort; I am appalled at what I’ve seen thus far. 

GH:  Are you referring to the Iraq war?

GW:  Of course not.  You are fighting for all the good reasons.  I’m talking about the way Americans treat each other.  Treat others, as you would like to be treated, follow God’s commandments; love God above all else, and your neighbor, as you love yourself.  If you follow these rules all will be well, remember “God and country”.

I say that, because there is always room for improvement, people in the 18th Century were not any different.  I have seen the goodness of the people in this country, and it moved me to tears.  I could not be more proud, and happy.

GH:  Sir, it’s been a pleasure.

GW:  Likewise Gabriel.  I’ll have that cup of coffee now if you don’t mind.