It’s strange. I’m eager and excited to do my job but not to kill..
..but killing is my job.
I can’t wrap my mind around it. Maybe I should talk to someone when I get back.
Thank God I ran into that chaplain who explained the difference between killing and murder. Otherwise I would either have lost my mind, or I wouldn’t be able to do this.
Joining the Army for college money doesn’t seem like a bad thing to do until you realize you may have to kill someone someday. Then you have to be sure you are doing the right thing. Is it murder if I shoot this guy? I’m I serving a cause bigger than myself? Is it murder, why, why or not? Does God exist? If he does, would he approve? What would my family and friends think of my actions? I learned so much form that chaplain. I felt relieved after our conversation. Three years of mental agony gone in 90 seconds.
Maybe it’s because I like the skill, hard work, and dedication that goes into mastering this craft that excites me. Maybe I like the process and it’s the result I’m not so fired up about.
The only other time I felt this excited was when I was doing well in math. Too bad I didn’t stick with it. Math, like everything else is a perishable skill and consistency is key.
Alright, enough! Focus. This is phase line one. I’m ten minutes ahead of schedule. I’ll stop, look, listen, smell, drink water, rest a little, and then travel another four miles. This time I’ll remember to bury my pee before I leave…only the paranoid survive.
Major Walsh said he has to infil and exfil using rivers because there were never any reports of patrols or vehicles before or after his attacks.
This guy is smart. He mainly targets officers. Which means he either knows our ranks or he can tell who is in charge by studying us.
Whenever he has the opportunity, he wounds a soldier and shoots his buddy in the head as he’s trying to save him.
Also, when he takes head shots he uses tracers because they penetrate our Kevlar easier.
And as of last week, he has shot tankers under the armpit as they open the hatch on the turret because that is the only part of the body not protected by armor. He has to be incredibly fast and accurate to make that shot.
He doesn’t know it, but tomorrow is his last day on earth.
(10 minutes later)
“Texan TOC (Tactical Operations Center) this is Texan three..over.
Go ahead Texan three.
Texan TOC. Time 2200, location phase line one..over.
Roger. Texan TOC out.”
(Something moving in the distance)
Fuck! What is that? Hide, stop, look, listen, smell, don’t fucking move or make any noise…
Well, it’s definitely not human…it’s a black trash bag. It’s being carried by the wind. That means the wind speed has to be at least 4 miles per hour. Good to know!
Man…I almost had a heart attack. As alert as I am, I really wasn’t expecting that.
I have to keep moving. I’m ahead of schedule but I have to reach phase line two before 0200 if I want to make it to the village before 0600.
(1 hour later)
“Hammer one this is Texan three over.
Texan three this is hammer one, go ahead.
Enemy convoy, in the open, stationary, four trucks, twenty-three combatants, no civilians, location PV16103025 over.
Texan three, I have enemy trucks at PV16103025, no civilians.
Hammer one, you are cleared hot.
Texan three, ninety seconds until impact.”
(90 seconds later)
“Hammer one, target destroyed.”
The KLE (Key Leader Engagement) will be at 1700 which means he will have to position himself facing east since the sun will be setting.
I hate facing the sun. It’s more difficult to see, but above all the reflection from my scope can give away my position.
I’ll just have to spot him before he spots me, and shoot from further than I would like.
I keep saying he, what if it’s a woman? I doubt it, but it’s possible. That would make this more difficult.
That’s another thing I don’t understand. Why would it be more difficult to shoot a woman? A life is taken.
Is it because I was taught to treat women with respect and kindness? Does it have something to do with the fact that that my mom is a woman?
Killing is such a horrible thing to do..almost unnatural.
I don’t even like hurting people’s feelings. I’ve been in a few fist fights and I hated it. I don’t like getting hurt and I don’t like hurting people; so, shooting someone is almost unthinkable.
Thank God I ran into that chaplain, otherwise I would have lost my mind.
I’m glad I’m able to focus on the task at hand when the time comes and stop thinking about these things.
I wonder what other snipers think about when they go on missions.
“Texan TOC this is Texan three..over.
Go ahead Texan three.
Texan TOC. Time 0200, location phase line two..over.
Roger. Texan TOC out.”
I love going on missions this late at night.
The hours between 0200 and 0500 are the quietest.
Sound travels further, so I can hear things moving a mile away.
Normal people are asleep since it’s the most peaceful, and darkest time of the night. The temperature drops, and that also helps people fall asleep. It’s safe to say only people up to no good are out this late.
Like the guys burying the IED (Improvised Explosive Device) last week…last mistake they ever made.
0530
Wow, that is so cool! I smelled that guy way before I heard him.
What a big contrast between now and my first missions. Back then I wouldn’t think about anything but my surroundings. I was so alert it was exhausting. Now I think just about everything else but I’m twice as sharp as I was back then. I don’t think it’s complacency, I think it’s experience.
(30 minutes later)
“Texan TOC this is Texan three..over.
Go ahead Texan three.
Texan TOC. Time 0600, I’m at the objective..over.
Roger. Texan TOC out.”
(10 hours later)
I see you.
It’s 1600 and you’re just now getting here? Unprofessional!
You’re not even trying to move tactically.
Conceited bastard. You must think you are untouchable.
Lieutenant Collins will be 980 yards from where you are. That would have been an impressive shot..one you will never make.
The clouds are moving slowly, the clothes on the lines are moving faster, and the paper and plastic trash is moving even faster.
8 mile an hour wind from the left, 8/4=2. Two mil dots to the left.
1245 yards. Aim high.
I’m sorry it came down to this.
I’m sorry you became complacent.
I’m sorry you made so many mistakes.
I respect your skill, discipline, talent, and your devotion to duty.
I’m sure we could have been good friends in a different life but right here..right now, I can’t let you hurt my teammates.
Steady, aim, breathe, squeeze…
